Life Coaching is a methodology that seeks to maximize personal development and the transformation of people and, to this end, generates changes in perspective and increases motivation, commitment and responsibility.

As an accompaniment to change, it allows for the understanding and learning of this process, and promotes the modification of cognitive, emotional and behavioral habits, helping in the expansion of one’s potential and capacity for action with respect to the acquisition of personal goals.

Discovering Life Coaching

Life Coaching pursues the well-being of people in different areas of life, so it works on personal mission, individual goals and needs, life projects, self-motivation, different strategies for change, etc.

This week, Mª Teresa Mata, psychologist from the Mensalus Institute of Psychological and Psychiatric Assistance, presents Life Coaching from a parallelism with sport.

Is sports training the same as personal resource training?

We train with the purpose of improving our physical and mental performance. For example, in terms of sport, we train to beat a record because we associate success with preparation (“I’ve been running three times a week to be able to participate in the race”, “the coach is pushing us to qualify and go to the championships”, “I swim for half an hour to increase muscle tone in my arms and back”, etc.).

This success is different for each one of us depending on the objective and the demand (for one, success means finishing the race; for another, it means getting on the podium and being among the three best). Even so, there will always be a routine behind each goal, either to get a time or to maintain a state of mind-body well-being (“I train to do the marathon in less than three and a half hours”/”I train to keep my back strong and not have any discomfort”).

The same goes for personal resources. If our desire is to improve “X” aspect (for example, to stop relating at work from a passive communicative style) it may be helpful to seek some type of training that will provide us with the tools we seek to achieve our goal (to be more assertive).

However, in life as in sport this does not happen overnight. Integrating learning through practice and repetition allows us to see ourselves in new ways and feel different. When the perception we have of ourselves changes, the way we relate to each other changes.

How can we train personal resources?

Training, in part, is already provided by one’s own life experience. School is training, work is training, leisure time is training, family meetings are training, moments of solitude are also training, etc. Every time we live an experience we obtain a learning that prepares us for the next moment. Every moment is useful information; whether we have a good time or a bad time, we get something out of it.

Still, we don’t always find the resources we want in our daily routine. Some specific goals may require extra learning. For example, continuing with the proposed situation (to stop being passive at work), this extra learning could be done through a group workshop or an individual coaching process aimed at increasing the ability to set limits and say no.

More specifically, what kind of work are we talking about?

In this case, training with a professional would help the person to make flexible those thoughts/beliefs that make it difficult for him/her to be assertive, increase the ability to express his/her opinion at different times and with different colleagues, improve the self-critical voice that detracts from his/her value and confidence, increase awareness of one’s own strengths, etc.

Is coaching only associated with skills training in the workplace?

Coaching is a discipline that brings us closer to achieving objectives that allow for development in different areas of our lives, not only in the professional field. It is true that the word coaching is especially associated with the training of skills related to leadership and team management, but coaching is much more.

Specifically, Life Coaching focuses on the training of skills to cope with everyday life, that is, to improve the management we have over our emotions and become more efficient people. Therefore, the famous emotional intelligence training (also considered coaching processes) have become valuable life training. The “lessons” that each one extracts from the experienced dynamics are transformed into slogans to live instead of surviving.

And what kind of audience performs a skills training or coaching process?

Life Coaching is especially suitable for people who are emotionally stable and enjoy good mental health but at the same time want to improve some vital aspect.

Many times the change a person seeks goes hand in hand with leaving certain comfort zones (not as comfortable as they seem). To achieve this, an external guide can set the plan of action; this someone is the life coach.

Sometimes we believe that we should be the ones to achieve the challenge, without the help of anyone. When this happens, are we making things difficult for ourselves?

There is a commonly held belief that “if I get it without any help, it is worth more. I just have to be able to.”

The question is: Why?

Do the resources we apply and/or acquire stop being ours? Does success stop being ours? Making things easier for us helps us to invest our vital energy in what we decide to do instead of wasting it in trying.

And what kind of tasks does this guide carry out that we call a coach or a life skills trainer?

The coach accompanies the person already committed to his or her goal.

Coaching is a process that seeks to overcome some exact aspect. That is why it is so important to make the goal concrete. In fact, this is one of the great secrets of a good coach: breaking down the objective until it becomes quantifiable and highly specific. People who start a Life Coaching process are surprised when they arrive at a first session and, with the help of the coach psychologist, they shape the reason for the consultation with which they come.

That said, the coach has the function of accompanying by insisting on the process of reflection and introspection of the individual. It is essential that the person asks himself new questions: untried solutions, new ways of doing and undoing.

Why is it so important that the person is already committed to their goal? Is it always like that?

Otherwise, it is impossible to start a coaching process. This does not mean, as we said, that the person knows exactly what goal he or she wants to work on. There is an idea and a need, but the objective is not drawn in detail (that’s why he is looking for help).

This first step of concretization provides the coachee (client) with the main clues about what aspects he will work on and what map he will follow, steps that, together with the coach, he will decide and review throughout the training.

Moreover, the commitment is so important that coach and coachee close the deal in a written document that, symbolically, reminds the protagonist of his role, an active role that, with the help of the coach, will work to assume the objective.

  • If you are interested in improving your wellbeing and want to benefit from the practice of Life Coaching, we invite you to find out without any obligation about the Life Coaching Workshop: “Where are you and where do you want to go” of Instituto Mensalus (Barcelona). To do so, just click on this link.