Although today it is considered a fad or a popular tool, in reality, coaching is one of the oldest human empowerment tools in existence , as well as one of the most self-knowledge, learning and wellbeing tools for people. Why?
Simply because this tool follows the principles of human nature itself: listening, knowing oneself, seeing oneself, and through a mirror asking powerful questions (that’s the coach), discovering all the potential we have and developing it through action (as well as reflection). However, nowadays there are a thousand myths about coaching and this makes it difficult for us to know what the reality and potential of this tool is. Do not be fooled. Find out what it is with this article, but above all don’t forget to experience it.
Coaching, in fact, comes from the Socratic dialogue .Socrates, with his followers, used a system of active listening and powerful questions so that they could discover how they interpreted life, tried to solve problems, or what their blockages were (blockages that we create ourselves, through our values, beliefs, impressions, interpretations, judgments about others and ourselves, always biased and limited).
This tool was modernized in the last 20th century with the practice of tennis, and later, with the development of a new type of business consulting in the USA (where these consultants, with the support of social psychologists, discovered that the deepest changes occurred in the people who were responsible for their decision making and were aware that they were the ones who could change their reality by changing something about themselves). Today, Coaching is a powerful human empowerment tool, both for companies… and for anyone, since Coaching works with people, it is a system for human beings.
The reasons for the controversies surrounding coaching
Why then are there so many myths if the tool is so simple? Mainly for three reasons. Firstly, coaching has become so popular (because of the powerful results it offers) that there is a lot of professional intrusion. In short, many people claim to be “coaches” when they are not, but offer talks, try to motivate, and sell you a theory of happiness, or advise you in some way (in nutrition, sports, public speaking, welfare, entrepreneurship, couple’s life, etc.).
- By the way, in this sense we can clearly distinguish: I recommend the article “Differences between Psychology and Coaching”.
Secondly, because there are too many coaching labels today , when in fact there is only coaching and the labels are only marketing strategies. And thirdly, because many people, instead of informing themselves and experiencing what coaching is really about, prefer to be left with the wrong impression. Let’s explain 10 simple myths about coaching… to help you really know what it is 😉
1. Coaching is for companies
Coaching is a tool often used by smart and humane companies. Why? Because the results they get depend on the state people are in… When a person awakens their potential and feels full, their professional results are greater. So coaching is not for companies… but for people, and companies are made up of people.
Coaching is for anyone who wants to awaken their talent and experience deep change.
2. Coaching is training
Although in English “coach” means to train, the coaching profession owes its name to the Hungarian word “kocz”, which means “car”. It is said that way because a coaching process is like a car journey, from where you are (how you think, believe, feel and act now) to where you can be (where you want to be if you develop that part of you that is a bit stuck)
3. Coaching is motivation for groups
Coaching does not motivate, but accompanies a person to learn how to motivate themselves . This is effective and lasts forever, whereas a group motivation is just that… a talk whose effect fades over time. Remember that coaching is a tool that takes place privately and personally, between the person and the coach, not in groups. Coaching tools can be used in a group but it will never be like a real coaching process.
4. Coaching is a system for making money
Nothing could be further from the truth. Coaching is a human empowerment tool, where you choose your goals and what you want to achieve in your life, what you want to change about yourself, what area of your personality you want to develop, what you want to learn.
5. Coaching is therapy
Coaching is not therapy,not psychology. Coaching is a tool focused on the present, on what is happening, and above all on solutions and your learning, while therapy focuses on problems or dysfunctional behaviors.
6. Coaching is professional training
Coaching helps you to discover your talent and develop it, and this may or may not serve you professionally, again depending on your goals. A true coach, accompanies you to achieve your goals, and you are the one who learns from yourself. A coach does not train you, does not teach you, does not intrigue you, is not a teacher. A coach only accompanies you in an expert way so that you learn from you, as Socrates did with his students, as if he were a faithful mirror of yourself.
7. Coaching is a technique to stop smoking, lose weight or have better self-esteem
The goals you choose in the coaching are up to you. You will tell them to your coach and that professional will help you to focus clearly on what you want. Coaching is never a system for achieving specific goals, it is freely chosen by the individual.
8. Coaching is a fashionable tool
As we said, coaching is as old as Socrates . Coaching probably exists since one human being listened to another, understood his way of seeing life, and asked him some question that made him realize that everything can be different.
9. Coaching is magic
The results of the coaching do not occur by magic nor are they based on any “secret”. It is you, the person, who achieves the results with your change, with your actions, with your commitment. The coach accompanies you on this path.
10. Coaching transforms your life
Coaching is just a tool but the main character is you. The coach is an expert in accompanying you on a path where you will learn quickly about yourself and where you can change your mental programming or way of seeing life and feel it… in such a way, that something will change in you and you will be more yourself than ever, more natural and fuller. It is you who transforms himself.
And finally, an equally important myth, not about coaching… but about coaches:
11. Being a coach is easy, you just have to have charisma…
A coach is above all a professional, a person trained in coaching in a hard way (at least, University master and several years of learning and professional experience , besides giving example with his own lifestyle, motivated by changes, challenges, responsibility and commitments). A coach is not the protagonist, but you are the protagonist. The success of a coach is the success of the people he works with. A coach can be a great speaker or have charisma, but above all you need a lot of learning, humility and experience, as well as knowledge and training. Actually, the most beautiful thing about this tool that can make us see how valuable we are and the great power we have to change our reality… is being a coachee (the person who hires the coach and wants to live the process).
- What makes a good coach? Find out by reading this article.
Remember also that a coaching process takes place privately between coachee (client) and coach, in private sessions (between 6 and 12). Coaching is just a system to accelerate your learning and discover you in time . Dare to start a journey towards yourself.