Newsreels and magazines have been filled these days with the fact that it came from the day I set one of the most beloved films of the last decades: “Back to the Future II” . In the film, the protagonist travels to October 21, 2015 , and there (here) is a vision of a future that in the end has little to do with what we really have. No flying cars, no time travel, no special skates… and they didn’t predict the mobile phones or tablets.
What would they be thinking about? Does this mean that in 2350 we won’t be able to do space travel? The televisions that give off smells will never arrive? Not even Rappel can be trusted!
The importance of expectations in our lives
Humor aside, this cinematic introduction brings me to the topic I want to talk about in this article: expectations . Expectations gather ideas, illusions, fears, predictions and hopes of what has not yet happened. We have expectations about the results we will get in exams and jobs, about how a new job will go, about how a medical treatment will work or about how that appointment will go. We have an idea of what we want our life to be like at 50, where we want to retire from, where we would like to raise our children, etc.
The thing is that not everything always happens as we expect . Life comes full of surprises and what we used to think was going to happen remains a simple memory in our minds of what might have been. When what we expected is not fulfilled, feelings and experiences such as disappointment, frustration, anger or sadness may come . Knowing how to adjust our expectations and face up to possible surprises and frustrations will help us in our daily lives. But how do we do this? How do we work on our thoughts of the future when we are saying that the future can be totally unpredictable? Here are a few tips.
6 tips for managing expectations and frustration
Be aware of how far you can go. I don’t want to take away from those who say that we can go wherever we want, but we have to be clear about which path will lead us to our goals . I can’t publish a book if I don’t put in the hours to write it and if I don’t also train in writing techniques, for example. Setting goals that we can achieve will help us make better use of our work and make it more bearable.
2.Control and be aware of your choices
Like many, I would like to have a mansion, but I am aware that in my situation and the money I have, it will probably never happen. It is not an act of resignation or discouragement, but of acceptance . Of knowing where I am, where I come from, and where I can go with what I have and what I am doing. It is about knowing what cards I have and knowing how to play them.
3. Tolerating Frustration
Not everything will always turn out the way we want it to. There will always be something out of our control and we need to know how to deal with it . First control your state of mind and the way it has affected you, and then relativize and reflect on what you can do, the level of gravity, of change, of threat, of benefits and what is really the priority.
You may be interested in: “Frustration Intolerance: 5 tricks and strategies to combat it”
Following the previous point, accepting that there will always be something we cannot control or expect will relieve many anxieties and discomfort r. This works especially in health and work contexts. Having medical tests, waiting for results, going to job interviews… all of these are situations marked by enormous uncertainty.Managing the nervousness and worries that these events cause is essential for coping with everyday life.
5.Trust the specialists
People who are knowledgeable about a topic will be able to guide you better on topics you don’t know and thus adjust your expectations on any given subject. With a psychologist, for example, you will have a more realistic idea of when you can overcome your loss , and you will achieve this better than if you look for that information yourself or get ideas based on other non-specialized sources of information.
6.Live in the present and learn from mistakes
What we really have is today, this moment when you’re reading this. We will never know 100% what will happen from here for a few days or a few months, but that does not take away from the fact that what we work on every day will lead us to a desired goal. Work day by day, be flexible, accept and fight changes and unforeseen events with all the elegance you can .
We invite you to take a look at this compilation: “25 positive phrases to focus better on day-to-day life”.
Rethinking our future
After these tips you may get the feeling that making movies about the future and science fiction doesn’t make any sense, but remember that movies are still movies, and that’s why filmmakers are there to make them! Let’s create our own movie every day and enjoy the shooting!