We tend to think that personal development is something that happens throughout our lives. However, neither personal development nor changes for the better in general work that way.

It is in certain moments of our life when we get tired of a certain situation we are living, we make a purpose of analysis, and we decide to live a process of change. Exactly: in life there is no constant change, but rather concrete moments in which we live a personal transformation. So… why don’t we fulfill our New Year’s resolutions?

Personal development from the end of the year

The New Year is often an excuse to set ourselves goals, purposes, which are in fact closely related to the personal and real change we want to achieve. However, those goals or purposes are rarely met… At the same time that we find ourselves in an ideal moment to commit ourselves and transform our daily lives, this is rarely achieved … What is stopping you? Where is the problem?

In the last 10 years I have accompanied as a psychologist and coach people from up to 8 different countries in their processes of change through empoderamientohumano.com. Although the change that each person needs to experience is different, there are a number of common factors that make change possible… and in turn, those factors disappear in the New Year as if by magic.

I will now explain what the 4 keys are for you to really live your process of change and personal transformation and what are the 3 factors that are probably preventing you from living it in the New Year.

A process of change is not only reflection and purpose . No matter how much you read self-help books or listen to lectures, it is only information that can move you or make you think, but not change itself. Change is only possible if you change, and that happens with different actions (they can be small everyday actions in your day-to-day life, in relation to how you communicate or use your time, understand your emotions, relate to others, etc.).

There are 4 clear keys to achieving change, purpose and objectives: commitment, perseverance, action plan and company.

1. Commitment

One of the main problems when we make resolutions is that our only commitment is that… to raise it and maybe try to take some steps, but not to live the whole process . You have to commit yourself to go all the way. It only serves you 100%.

2. Constancy

A process of change implies small changes every day, not meeting 1 or 2 weekly objectives . The change is in you and it must be in you.

3. Action plan

Without action there is only thought, intention, will, not genuine change. An action plan with concrete goals that lead to your personal change will make you achieve more results, new experiences, more well-being and rewarding experiences than all the new year’s resolutions you can imagine.

4. Company

Above all, company is important, because we are social beings who need the other to get out of their personal circle . This is why it is important that in your change process you have professional and expert supervision. If you would like me to accompany you, you can take a free first step with an exploratory session at empoderamientohumano.com.

Why don’t you usually keep your New Year’s resolutions?

The above keys reflect in turn what are the main factors why we do not achieve the famous New Year’s resolutions. They are these.

1. Not the right purpose

We choose them from desire but not from reality or our limits, and above all, are not purposes that really imply a change . Going to the gym or quitting smoking is great, but it is not the real change. The real change is: what is stopping you? What has to change in you to live a life where health (without tobacco) or going to the gym or doing physical activity is an everyday thing and part of you?

Lack of commitment

We set forth purposes, but we are not committed to living the process of change that leads to them

3. Lack of constancy and company

We make resolutions in moments of emotion, but then we do not know how to manage the moments when, once again, we are flooded by laziness and procrastination. With the company, the commitment and the necessary constancy, that would not happen.

Now is the time to stop making New Year’s resolutions and focus on something more important and profound: what is the personal change you want to make within yourself that will transform your life and experiences? Tell me if you want to.