Fear is only a problem when you’re afraid of your fears

The
fear is probably the most popular human emotion in recent times, especially since social networks became our main means of communication. We share videos and phrases about fear and we constantly tell ourselves that we should not be afraid , we bet on a life without fear, we consider it our worst enemy. What would happen if human beings were never afraid?

Fear is one of the most basic emotions of the human being, as well as of any mammal.
It is an emotion that plays a fundamental role: survival What would happen if we lived without fear? There is only one possibility: we would die . Without fear, we would live so recklessly that we would endanger our lives and die within a few days of not being afraid. Fear has a very important use in our lives. Our big problem with fear is that we live with dysfunctional fears.

Let’s go a little deeper into what this instinctive emotion is and what it’s for.

What is fear?

According to experimental psychology,
there are six primary emotions: joy, surprise, anger, sadness, disgust, and fear . Experiments find these six emotions because they find six different facial expressions, although there are many more emotions depending on the culture and vocabulary with which we describe those emotions.

Fear, however, is a basic and primary emotion, since it is found in all cultures and feeling it has great consequences on the organism.
It is an unpleasant emotion , since it makes us feel bad (although not negative, since feeling emotions is always positive, whatever they are). It is also a passive emotion, since it tries to withdraw us from what is happening. When we feel fear, it makes us feel helpless too. What happens when we feel fear, is that we withdraw.

What’s the use of fear? Functions and effects

Fear is often characterized as a negative emotion, something to be avoided and linked to unhappiness. However, the truth is that if fear is an emotion present in practically all the cultures that have been studied, it is possible to infer that it is there for a reason. Does it play a relevant role? What is fear for?

In short, fear is a survival tool, an adaptive mechanism to an environment that sometimes gives us reason to fear it. What fear is good for has to do with our ability to react quickly to dangerous situations, since thanks to it we withdraw when there is a threat. This threat can be to our life, or to our
self-esteem, our security (according to our beliefs about what is safe or not), our self-concept.

So fear is just an emotion that reacts according to our mental patterns, our beliefs and thoughts. Fear in itself is positive, it helps us to move away from an event for which we are not yet prepared .

You may be interested in this post:
“Why do we like horror movies?”

When is fear a problem?

Fear is a problem when it’s
dysfunctional . It is important to clarify that there are no positive or negative emotions (this is said in manuals where, what is intended, is the psychological diagnosis and even those concepts that are so orthodox and wrong are used). Feeling emotions is positive, it is always positive to feel any emotion, since they have some kind of utility and we should feel our emotions with freedom instead of repressing them or trying to control them.

The problem, with any emotion, is when our beliefs and interpretations cause us to feel fear in a way
dysfunctional , that is, what happens as a result of feeling that fear is even worse than what would happen if we didn’t feel it. Example: many times we do not do what we want and it is really important in our life because we are afraid of what might happen (traveling, going to another country to live, starting our own business, starting a relationship, doing something new on our own, speaking in public, dancing in front of other people, etc.).

If we manage our fear dysfunctionally, it will slow us down too much. Remember: fear is not a problem, it only obeys us…
The problem is what we do with fear .

Things that make us afraid (phobias)

There are several aspects of life (situations, ideas, objects…) that generate fear in many people . Below is a list of different phobias; by clicking on the title you can access a detailed report on each one of them.

  • Agoraphobia (anticipatory anxiety)
  • Amaxophobia (panic about driving)
  • Anuptophobia (fear of remaining single)
  • Coulrophobia (fear of clowns)
  • Erythrophobia (panic to blush)
  • Philophobia (fear of falling in love)
  • Gerascophobia (fear of aging)
  • Hematophobia (blood panic)

And for a more general review on the different phobias that exist and their characteristics, you can visit this article:

  • Types of Phobias: Exploring Fear Disorders

What does fear matter?

Fear is such an important emotion, that
we could not live without it . Our happiness and well-being depend on the decisions we make in our lives and on how we interpret what happens. We are responsible for being well and making our life a fascinating experience.

Fear helps us regulate how big our steps should be at any given moment… like a kind of prudent mother. Again, this happens when we manage our fear in a functional way, that is, we have some fear of what may really be a problem for us now and we still need some training or waiting time to be able to cope with it.

How should we handle it?

Ask yourself what you’d really like to do and you don’t. What you’d like to live and don’t live. How you would like your life to be and you don’t do what it takes to get there. All these fears: what are they based on? Your beliefs? A fact from the past? What could you do so that this fact does not affect you anymore?

An emotional management process, to increase your level of emotional intelligence (which would help you to manage your fear functionally and to understand others’ fears and help them) is probably the best way to jump into dysfunctional fear. This note will not end with a “don’t be afraid”… but with a “live large despite your fears” .