Looking at what we know about our history, it seems that we humans have always wanted to appear more than what we are . Both through the exaggeration of the characteristics that define us and through the invention of traits that, deep down, do not characterize us. This occurs at a collective level, as seen for example in the great monuments designed to impress, but also, and this is the most painful of all, at an individual level.

And I say that it is painful because, beyond how badly certain people who live by and to appear to be what they are not, vanity is, in reality, something that prevents us from knowing people . A barrier that keeps us apart, where it exists to a greater or lesser extent.

And this becomes a problem when we ask ourselves the key question…

Who is safe from vanity?

When we have to make quick decisions about who to direct our attention to, many times we end up surrendering to the possibility of judging through appearances and clichés and favoring the people who wrap their identity in them. We like authentic people better, but we prefer those who live by the image.

Yes, authenticity is not characterized as having been very abundant years ago, but there are those who say that today authentic people are in critical danger of extinction. The reasons? The culture of spectacle, the importance of image over content, the dictatorship of fast consumption. These are principles that seem to belong to the sphere of advertising, marketing and markets, but which increasingly invade the terrain of the human, the personal.

Being honest pays off

Not only does it positively reinforce vainglorious behavior. Honesty is also punished . This is logical, considering that many studies show that a large part of professional success also depends on our personal image. This happens in practically every field of work, but it is somewhat extreme in the case of professions in which aesthetics are a determining factor.

In certain social networks such as Instagram you can see how there is a bubble of speculation based on aesthetics. We saw it in the case of the model Stina Sanders and the scandal that was formed when she started climbing selfies without makeup, or in the case of Essena O’Neill.

How do you recognize authentic people?

In view of this, it is not surprising that authentic people can be difficult to find: they are buried under a flood of social dynamics that invite them to stop acting as they do.

However, with a little dedication and practice it is possible to come to recognize someone whose way of being and acting is consistent with their way of thinking .

Knowing these basic characteristics can help you to claim this way of understanding life and, moreover, to self-evaluate whether you are succeeding in linking personal development with the conquest of an authentic personality.

Which people are really authentic? Their basic characteristics are as follows.

1. do not constantly think about their image

This is possibly its most defining feature. Of course, everything is relative, so real people may spontaneously think about how they are seen by others, but this does not become an obsessive loop .

This means, for example, that they rarely ask for a second opinion on their appearance , and that they do not care about appearing indifferent to their image either, something that ironically could happen if they ascribed themselves in a very rigid or dogmatic way to an aesthetic trend that by pure conventionality we relate to carefree and alternative (hipsters, punks, etc.).

2. Do not force their nonverbal language

This is a practical consequence of the above feature. People who try to adopt very imposed movements and tone of voice are relatively easy to recognize, because it is very difficult to learn a series of movement patterns that do not correspond to those we have been learning and using since our childhood.

In this way, their non-verbal language is natural and you won’t see them trying to pretend to be what they are not .

3. are not afraid to show their opinions

Authentic people speak as free thinkers, and will clearly express their ideas even if these may seem very radical or strange . The reasons? They know that in most spaces the free expression of their ideas will not give them serious problems, and therefore they do not give up taking advantage of the possibilities that a good conversation with someone offers.

This makes them good conversationalists, although sometimes their reflections can cause controversy among those used to a politically correct line of argument.

4. They try to understand others

Leaving behind vanity and misunderstood pride also implies, to a greater or lesser extent, renouncing clichés and stereotypes to try to “read the mind” of someone who is not very well known.

Where other people throw in the towel in the belief that they already know what the other is like, authentic people take on the challenge of matching their understanding of reality with that of their interlocutors.

5. Do not prejudge

Authentic people are not very fond of making decisions based on how their possible options are presented to them . Therefore, they like to re-examine what happens to them, taking into account what things are objective and what are simply biases and prejudices fabricated arbitrarily by others.

This does not mean that to be authentic one cannot be impulsive, but that one does not fall into easy judgments and question the prevailing opinions. What they call “rebellious spirit”.