Verbal communication has been the great aptitude of the human being , given that it is the basis of practically all the culture and thought of our species.

It is not only verbal communication that is the act of speaking, i.e., orally emitting words. It is also the act of writing, since through writing concrete information is also transmitted. However, negligent verbal skills can significantly impair our ability to convey the message we want to make our audience understand.

That is why it is very important to learn how to master verbal communication, something we will see in this article, in addition to briefly explaining what exactly this type of communication is and how it differs from non-verbal communication.

What is verbal communication?

Verbal communication is understood to mean the act of transmitting information by means of words, which can be issued orally or in writing . In other words, and unlike what many people believe, verbal communication, apart from being the act of speaking, is informing in written form, using words and phrases that make sense.

Normally, when talking about communication, a very clear distinction is made between verbal and non-verbal, as if water and oil were the same thing. But the truth is that both types of human communication need each other, since it is not possible to convey a message in a fully effective and unambiguous way by relying on verbal communication alone.

When we talk to someone we always notice their facial gestures, hand movements, tone of voice… These aspects of non-verbal communication can indicate whether what the person says is in accordance with what they really think. For example, if the person tells us that she is very calm and yet she is constantly moving her legs, she is transmitting nervousness.

What should be stressed is that verbal communication is a very useful tool for the human species that, if not properly mastered, can give rise to misunderstandings . If you do not have good verbal skills, the message you are trying to send will not be well understood by the audience, whether it is made up of listeners or readers. Thus, this audience will not understand the message or know how to ask the right questions.

How to master verbal communication?

There are several strategies that can be put into practice to master verbal communication. Below, we will see a list of all of them with clarifying examples.

1. Getting off to a good start

On many occasions, especially when it is a first encounter with another person, how the first minutes of the conversation are spent will deeply mark the relationship in the future .

First impressions have a very significant impact on how you view others, and the way you speak is a key aspect. During the first contact you should be friendly and try to use a calm tone.

Regardless of the context in which the conversation is taking place, one should try to talk about more neutral and generic topics, in order to give way to those issues in which there may be a greater polarization of opinions .

2. Preparing the theme

To be able to master verbal communication, whether oral or written, it is necessary to have a broad mastery of the subject to be spoken about . It is very important to document oneself before starting a conversation or writing a text.

Whether it’s an informal conversation with friends or a final year exhibition, it’s very important to prepare the topic you’re going to talk about.

It is not only a matter of proving that one knows about the subject . If, for example, you are going to discuss a particular issue and try to convince others of your position, the use of data that you know contributes to strengthening your opinion.

3. Choosing the right words

To facilitate the understanding of the audience, one should try to say or write the words that are most appropriate both to the level and to the type of listeners or readers to whom the speech is addressed .

For example, when writing a paper on psychology, if it is aimed at a non-specialist audience, one should avoid using technical terms or, if they are mentioned, describe exactly what they are.

On the contrary, if the same document is addressed to psychologists and related professionals, in that case it will not be necessary to describe each term used, since it will be understood that the audience to whom it is addressed already knows them.

By choosing the appropriate words, it will be possible to capture on the mind of the receiver an image very similar to the one we have imagined in our mind . In the case that the language is vague or too abstract for the situation we are talking about, the meaning of what we are trying to say will be carried away by the wind.

Also, the use of words that are too strange makes the conversation or text in question a bit heavy and not very dynamic.

4. Speaking clearly

You should speak clearly, that is, by vocalizing the phonemes appropriately and using a volume suitable for the space you are in, in case you are speaking orally.

If we speak too softly, the other person will not understand anything, and may interpret that we are not sure what we are talking about or we are afraid that someone will hear us , which may be interpreted as saying a secret.

On the other hand, if you speak at too high a volume, it can be interpreted as being angry or wanting to convey some kind of negative feeling about the message being broadcast.

5. Use an appropriate tone

To use a proper tone, you must first be aware of what tone you are using. This may seem difficult, since everyone speaks and reads from their own perspective and values the tones of others based on their own. However, once we have managed to identify our tone, it will take some patience and time to work on improving it .

In case you are writing a text, a good way to know what the tone of the document is, is simply to read it aloud before handing it over to the person who is playing. By reading the words aloud, it is possible to find out what the tone is, and if any modifications are necessary.

The words used, by themselves, may be appropriate to the topic being discussed and the audience they are aimed at; however, there are certain constructions that can be interpreted as sarcasm, pedantry or excessive formality .

6. Looking into the eyes

Although this point would be more related to non-verbal communication, it is important to mention that supports the effective communication of what we are trying to say by means of words .

Looking into the eyes of the person you are talking to helps to make a certain connection, which is essential for both parties to be aware of what the other is saying.

But be careful not to stare too much. This can be interpreted in many ways and none of them are comfortable for the interlocutor.

7. Focus on the audience

If you are speaking orally, you should pay attention to the other person and concentrate on what he or she is saying .

It is possible that, as you speak, questions may come to mind to clarify certain points made previously in the conversation, however, an effort should be made to avoid thinking about them while the other person is speaking.

Thinking about what questions will be asked can make us run the risk of not paying attention to the person and, coincidentally, he is answering the question we are going to ask him.

When we do, the person will tell us that he or she has already told us and may be a little upset that we are not paying attention.

8. Avoiding distractions

It may be the case that, while talking to another person, there is background noise. This should be avoided, or try to ignore this stimulus and focus on what the person you are talking to is saying.

If you cannot control this distraction, you can invite the other speaker to go somewhere where there is less noise or where there are not so many distractions , stressing that you want to say something more or less important.

9. Avoid focusing too much on one point

Whether you are having a conversation or writing a document, you may have more influence on some topics than others. This is not necessarily a bad thing, but those points that deserve it should be given adequate prominence , no more than necessary.

Points that may be superficial but still give meaning to the conversation or text as a whole should also be taken into account.

This is why we must avoid focusing too much on one point, as this would run the risk of appearing too heavy or only having understood a very small part of the whole subject.

10. Encouraging the participation of others

A fairly common situation, which would be within the verbal communication of oral type, is that in the same conversation not only two people participate, but more. In this type of situation it usually happens that, in spite of there being several members in the group, only two or, at most, three are the ones holding the real conversation.

A good way to demonstrate solid verbal skills, in addition to strengthening the bonds between the speakers , is to encourage the participation of others. In addition to not feeling ignored, they may say something that enriches the conversation, but that they have not dared to say before due to lack of assertiveness.

11. Summarize

After having spoken at length about a topic or, if the conversation or text in question is coming to an end, it is always good to summarize the main points mentioned throughout the conversation .

In this way, it is possible to review what has not been made completely clear, and to influence it if it is convenient.

On the other hand, a demonstration is made of the attention span that has been put into practice throughout the conversation or in the preparation of the written text.

Bibliographic references:

  • Serra, M. (2013) Psychology of communication and language. Barcelona: Edicions i Publicacions de la Universitat de Barcelona.
  • Carroll, D.W. (2006). Psychology of language. Madrid: Thomson
  • Miller, G. (1985) Language and speech. Madrid: Alianza editorial
  • Cortès-Colomé, M. (2016). Psychology of linguistic communication. Madrid: Síntesis.