The generation of the millennium or “the millenials” is the generation that brings together young people born between 1981 and 1995 who became adults at the turn of the millennium, those of us who today are young adults very different from the young people of the generations that preceded us.

According to information from INEGI ( National Institute of Statistics and Geography ) in 1990, a total of 19 million Mexicans were between 20 and 34 years, while in the last census, the 2010 population between 20 and 34 years reaches a total of 27 million people. With these figures, there is no doubt that today, in Mexico, it is young people who have the greatest participation, politically, culturally and socially.

Millenials: a generation with its lights and shadows

And no, it is not that we are more rebellious than the young people of the 80’s or that we have more ideals than the generation of the 60’s had in their time; it is simply that we were born in an era with different characteristics, above all with regard to the technological and media environment . We were baptized by the Internet and everything around it. Today we are just a click away (and a good internet connection) from knowing the whole world.

Internet and social networks and the changes in communication

The emergence and rise of the Internet, as well as the various related technological advances, make talk of social networks, search engines, applications and “the cloud” are everyday terms for young people today, who undoubtedly use daily expressions such as “you google it”, “we google” or “you left me in sight”.

The Internet has permeated our daily lives, from the way we get jobs (it’s common to hear about online job offers where the only contact is through email exchange), to how we keep in touch with our friends (we no longer spend hours glued to our landlines because it’s easier to send an instant message with photo and video).

The Internet has also changed the way we consume. Activities as basic as going to the supermarket have started to become outdated, since it is no longer necessary to stand in lines or go through the bustle of the crowd because we can do the shopping from the computer or tablet. Talking about the impact that the Internet has generated in our lives would take more than one article; however, we can highlight an aspect that has been transformed thanks to the Internet: the way in which “the millenials” establish social relationships.

Before addressing this controversial subject, I must clarify that the feeling remains unchanged, that is to say, love is love, friendship is friendship and even the feeling of rejection towards a person remains despite technological advances. However, what does change are the places, the processes through which we establish personal relationships and even the temporality with which these are established and the new dimension that is born from this new technological and cultural paradigm.

Social networks as scenarios

Today we are linking through social networks, applications and video conferencing , because it’s easier to discuss a topic of interest in a WhatsApp group than it is to bring together the 25 contacts to whom you are sending the message, and you can keep track, whether you want to or not, of what your contacts are doing without having to talk to them. If you really need to talk to your friend who lives miles away from you, it can be solved with a video conference coffee. You don’t even need to imagine moments anymore, a picture on your wall can bring you closer to the experience; and if that’s the intention of social networking, keep in touch.

This means that social networks as a stage only motivate us to take our personal relationships to another plane , just to make them easier, although along the way we lose certain levels of privacy and intimacy. Through the exchange of “inbox” or thanks to the video call in “Skype” we enjoy the possibility of connecting immediately with friends who live far away. The above situation is explained by answering a simple question, most of our contacts, for example on Facebook, are people we know outside of the virtual world; our best friend, family, even our partner.

At this point social networks fulfill their function, they make it easier for us to stay in touch, the essence of relationships is the same, I am a friend of someone, I have a relationship with someone, I dislike someone, etc. What changes is that now we take it to the virtual plane to keep us closer.

The scopes of social networks

Social networks (whether it’s Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Skype, WhatsApp or any other) such as the “6 degrees of separation” hypothesis (taken up by Milgram in 1967) arise from the idea that we are just a few people away from meeting everyone. This could be exemplified by the idea that each person has an acquaintance, and this acquaintance, in turn, knows someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows us. A very real idea that leads us to realize that the world is a handkerchief.

Although we are not six people away from knowing everyone, thanks to social networks we are a little closer, since we can be in contact with people we know, but we can also meet people with our same interests even without knowing how they are, if we give “like” to the same pages we are already connected. It is also notorious the ease with which we can establish contact with people that perhaps we thought was impossible, we are only a “follow” away from our writer, singer, commentator, artist or favorite person.

Social networks catapult us into the world , to the extent that we can publish a photo and in less than two seconds it can be “likeing” someone on the other side of the planet. This makes it common to know cultural customs of other countries thanks to a video that someone shared, or that it is increasingly common for young people to have love relationships at a distance.

This way of establishing virtual relationships thanks to the reach of social networks leads us to know the new processes through which a link is developed, even if it is by means of a smartphone or a computer, and with the limitations that this support entails.

Social networks and new interaction processes

Now it is time to move on to the most interesting part of the article, analyzing the impact that virtual life has had on our lives.This influence is not only reflected in the way we speak or write; it has undoubtedly changed the way we relate to each other, since we can be part of different groups without even knowing their members. If we have a common taste we are already connected, even if we don’t like the idea very much, and I am referring to the typical one: “You don’t know me but I added you because I liked your profile picture”.

A tool to lose the shame of meeting other people?

It is no longer necessary to go through the whole ritual of seeing each other, chatting once, going out again, and realizing things in common, because with the profile of this contact you already have knowledge of many relevant aspects of their life . This makes it easier to know whether or not you like the person before you meet them in person, or at least you can better assess whether it is worth trying to get to know them better.

What’s more, you no longer need to think “Are you interested in me as a friend or something else”, you are a “match” away from meeting your ideal partner, and although it sounds like a joke, this is due to the appearance of applications of this type, which in seconds relate you to a person, either because he or she likes the same things as you, because you live close by, or because you are both looking for a partner. Even apps have appeared that put you in touch with people who are physically close… who said fear?

The Good and Bad of Social Media

Don’t get me wrong: social networks are neither good nor bad by themselves . We usually enjoy talking about their shortcomings, but they also have their positive side. For example, they save you a lot of horrible dates, because before going out with a person you do a review of their profile and get an idea of who they are; they also offer you the possibility of meeting many people from different places, or so close to you that you knew they didn’t even exist.

But we should also reflect on the problems that social networks cause. We have all noticed how the profile photos of some contacts do not correspond much to their attractiveness in real life. Another small problem is that we tend to delegate some positive communication intentions, such as compliments, to a simple like a profile picture: it is more comfortable. We now know that someone will be interested in you if they don’t “see” you in the WhatsApp conversation, and that it is more important for your partner to change their relationship status on Facebook from “single” to “in a relationship” than to receive a bouquet of roses with a dedication.

Tinder: the ultimate flirting app?

Tinder , my favourite app, and no, not because I use it, but because it reflects the impact of social networks on our relationships.

We logged in with a profile that we built based on our tastes, indicating the place where we live and adding a description of oneself, taking into account that we can not have a single photo because this application links us to the photos on Facebook, all the photos, the ones we uploaded and in which we were labeled; (eye, much eye).

Then, the application, thanks to a “magic” process, puts us in touch with people who are close to us , in the same country and region, so you can “flirt” anywhere. This app allows you to discard or “like” any profile that appears. If you are a discerning matchmaker you have nothing to worry about as there are hundreds of thousands of profiles, you may like some of them. We’ve come to the strong part of the process, the “match”, which means that a profile that you liked you also liked. If you get a match you can start a conversation with the profile and after this point it’s up to you, and that person you talk to.

Tinder would be the friend who introduces you to the ones you like at the party, but without having to get the invitation to the party. It has another advantage: you don’t have to choose which clothes to wear and, more importantly, you can discover hundreds of people without moving from your location and quickly.