One problem that multiple partners suffer from is the monotony in their sex life . And you have to take the bull by the horns, because if they are not able to gather enough courage to face it in time, it can lead to the break-up of the couple. This is due to what in psychology is known as hedonic adaptation, which refers to the fact that human beings get used to happiness quickly and get bored quickly if they do not find new ways to achieve it.
Talking about sex with your partner: the best springboard to a creative sex life
In the area of sex, hedonistic adaptation is genderless. Both men and women end up unconsciously bored of making love to the same person, and this boredom can be accentuated if the couple’s sexual repertoire is always the same.
Psychologists specialized in couples therapy always advise to talk about these issues with the couple and explore new ways and means to engage in non-competitive sexual dialogue . Talking about sex with your partner is important to keep the flame burning. The problem lies in the discomfort that this type of conversation can generate in our couples, so it is recommended that we follow a series of guidelines to make these conversations less embarrassing.
Foreplay, the perfect time to talk about sex
Cold sex proposals, especially of this type, often receive negative responses, because of the fear or shame they can generate in our partner. It is also not a good idea to make the proposals once the preliminaries are over, since we can catch the couple off guard and make the moment of passion cold.
The key is to do this during the preliminaries , when he or she is open to suggestions. Foreplay should be understood in its broadest definition: a romantic dinner, a kiss, on the way home, etc. You must find the right moment to talk about sex so that your partner feels comfortable.
Play as a way of having fun in bed
Another way to make proposals to make them attractive, making sex a fun game, is to make different choices for our partner.A dance, a new posture, or a role play… and our partner should choose the one she likes best. If our partner has liked the idea, we can ask her to play the same game with us. In this way, we introduce new things into our sex life in a fun way and without generating pressure on performance.
Talking about sex with our partner after the meeting is always a good idea
The most important thing when introducing something new into our sex life is to know if the couple liked the novelty. It could be that it has been lived as a pleasant experience for both of us, for one of the two of us, or simply that everything has remained in one more shared anecdote, something that is already valuable.
Therefore, it is important to talk to our partner during and/or after we have finished to comment on whether we are enjoying the experience. Talking about sex in an open way with our partner will help us lose our fear of trying new things and will improve the quality of our sex life. Talking and listening too, of course!