The psychologists and psychology students are faced, day after day, with a number of clichés, stereotypes and myths about their profession. One facet of these clichés are the phrases that, for some reason, every psychologist has had to hear on multiple occasions.

Phrases most hated by psychologists (or myths about psychologists)

They are topical and hackneyed phrases , fruit of the lack of knowledge about the profession of psychologist. With this article we hope to raise awareness among the general population: Abstain from using these cliché phrases!Your family member, friend or acquaintance who is dedicated to psychology will be eternally grateful .

Let’s get started:

1. Are you a psychologist? Don’t read my mind!

It’s a phrase that can really irritate the psychologist. Nobody has the ability to read the mind of other people, nobody. If that were the case, mental health professionals would not use tests and a multitude of techniques to explore the patient’s psyche; one "mental reading" would be enough to know the person’s problems.

On the other hand, why the aggressive attitude? You may not be the most interesting person in the world, I don’t have to look forward to discovering the wonderful things you think. You don’t have to warn me about something I hadn’t even thought of doing .

Psychologists are dedicated to analyzing behavioral patterns, personality traits, psychosocial contexts, and that kind of thing. From this objective information, we can draw some hypothesis about the patients, or foresee behaviors that may develop in the future based on the parameters studied. This means that we are not like Sandro Rey : we do not have crystal balls or glasses "scientifically proven" that allow us to see beyond the common perception.

There is also the affable person who insists that you read his mind. This is a nice variant of the topic, since at least it is not born from a passive-aggressive attitude. A few words for the person asking me to read his mind: I admire your open and jovial disposition towards life and that you want to show me your inner world. I hope you won’t be disappointed if I tell you that the work of a psychologist is much less mystical. Anyway, I invite you to a coffee, to compensate you .

2. Psychologists are crazy

It is not unreasonable to think that in every psychologist there is a point of madness . It happens with everyone who loves their discipline of knowledge; that which they have studied and which is probably their vocation. It is perhaps for this reason that people can conclude that "he who spends so much time thinking about the psyche, can perhaps end up a little touched…".

The truth is that many television series have paved the way for this myth of the madness of psychologists to gain followers. The cultural products they offer us are fiction and their plots are based on the anomalous, the unexpected, the shocking… hence the psychotherapists who come to life in the series or films are the most eccentric . Just as, for example, Doctor House embodies a misanthropic and narcotic-addicted doctor, but to extrapolate that all doctors are like him would be a grave mistake.

However, the reality is quite different. Most psychologists are very normal , and even boring, if you hurry.

3. Where’s the couch? You can’t be a psychologist if you don’t have a couch.

To begin with: psychologists are not given the divan at graduation . Buying a couch if you are going to have a consultation (which is another thing, not all psychologists are dedicated to psychotherapy) is not obligatory nor does it violate any law if you don’t have one.

The couch was widely used by psychoanalysts as a matter of tradition. Some current psychotherapists, whether they are of the psychoanalytic current or any other, may decide to have it, or not. The divan does not have magical powers nor does it suppose any added value. Its function is to help the patient to relax and express his or her concerns and problems better, and to prevent him or her from looking into the psychotherapist’s eyes and feeling self-conscious.

If you go to therapy and your psychologist doesn’t have a couch but an ordinary sofa or an armchair, please don’t think he is a bad psychologist because of that , and avoid him having to hear the cliché phrase: “where is the couch?

4. “With what psychologists charge, they must be rich”

This point depends a lot on the country you are in: in each region there are some parameters of fees for the psychotherapist, or the profession is valued better or worse. This influences what you pay for a psychotherapy session. Is it expensive to go to the psychologist ? Well… as Pau Danés would say, it all depends .

In general terms, psychologists are not rich . Far from it, wow. Many people think that by studying psychology they will become millionaires by spending time in a doctor’s office, and then they find the harsh reality.

So why do psychologists charge so much? Well, let’s start doing the math. You must be aware when assessing whether a therapy session is too expensive that we therapists have studied four years of our career and, having graduated, we have had to take postgraduate courses, masters … It is an investment in time and money that is not negligible. Masters in Spain are no less than 3,000 euros. And, with the latest fee increase, each year of the course can cost more than 1,500 euros.

On the other hand, the tests needed to diagnose patients are surprisingly expensive . Add to that the rent of the office, the taxes (income tax, self-employed…), the civil liability insurance, the material (the couch too, but it is optional). And notice, moreover, that we psychologists not only work with our patients during the sessions, but we can spend many hours at home going over the history, looking for information, correcting tests and activities, learning better techniques, updating, training… There are many hours spent behind each patient, and they are not visible to the naked eye.

In any case, and especially after the crisis, the truth is that there are psychologists who can treat you at a very affordable price . There are also those who, as a matter of prestige, charge much more for their sessions. There is everything in the Lord’s vineyard, but if you really need therapy, money should not be an obstacle.

5. “No, I just don’t believe in it” (in psychology)

I’m happy for you , that you know. From the heart.

But let’s proceed to analyze this cliché phrase. The truth is that psychology is neither a religion nor anything like it . It is not a matter of “believing or not believing”, as if psychology were something like an act of faith. You may not believe in the law of gravity, but it is proven that there is something that attracts bodies to the ground. Therefore, your opinion about it is totally irrelevant since the laws of physics are there and they will not stop acting no matter how much you do not believe in them. We could say that psychology or physics have enough self-esteem so that they are not affected by your passing from them.

Psychology is governed by the scientific method; it tries to analyze reality from methodological bases contrasted to be able to reach true conclusions. This does not mean that everything that bears the surname “psychology” is absolutely indisputable, nor does it mean that there cannot be methodological failures that can lead to erroneous conclusions (as occurs in almost any social or health science).

Psychology is a science that currently falls within the framework of the health sciences . You cannot “not believe” in psychology, in any case you will have a critical view of the methodology and empirical evidence used by this discipline. The empirical evidence provided by psychology regarding the knowledge of the psyche is dynamic and mutable , of that there is no doubt (the human being is changeable!), but it is undeniable that these data result in an improvement in the quality of life of people who come to therapy, this is scientifically proven (sorry for the tautology).

Of course, the study of psychology is regulated within a fairly demanding legal framework.

If by this sentence “I don’t believe in psychology” you mean that you don’t like psychologists , you are entitled to have that opinion, but if that is the case, it is better to explain yourself properly and not use the typical sentence, because as you have read, it is a falsehood.

6. “You can’t get angry; you’re a psychologist!”

By the same logic, a doctor cannot catch a cold, a mechanic cannot break down his car, or a dentist cannot get a toothache. You must bear in mind that we psychologists are exposed to high levels of stress: we are faced with the emotional burden of listening to all patients’ problems, and we are supposed to be trained not to be affected, but…

Outside the consultation, we psychologists are people of flesh and blood , we get excited, we laugh, we cry, and… we have faults. Although it is incredible.

Although our training and profession provide us with skills in controlling emotions and managing stress and conflict, we are not immune to having bad moments, making mistakes, getting angry, etc. This does not mean that we are bad psychologists : we must learn to separate our personal and professional lives, and also know how to consider that psychotherapists are people, and therefore, perfection is not our common denominator. Neither ours, nor anyone else’s.

7. “Psychology is not a science!”

Here we go again to those types of people who, for one reason or another, “don’t believe in psychology”. This time it is the turn of the person who asserts that psychology is not a science . First of all, one might ask what that person understands by “science”. Because perhaps his view of the scientific is reduced to mathematical and physical laws , perfect and immutable. This purist vision of the concept ‘science’ is not accepted by almost anyone.

Actually, science is … (encyclopaedia pull):

“The ordered set of systematically structured knowledge. Science is the knowledge obtained through the observation of regular patterns, reasoning and experimentation in specific fields, from which questions are generated, hypotheses are constructed, principles are deduced and general laws and systems organized by means of a scientific method are elaborated”. [Source: Wikipedia]

And, without a doubt, psychology is a science insofar as it is the discipline of knowledge that studies, in an orderly manner and following the scientific method , human behavior and mental processes. What this means is that psychology establishes hypotheses about phenomena and then tests them empirically (through systematic observation), like any other science . In fact, psychology is still a discipline that drinks from biology, medicine, chemistry, neurosciences, social sciences and even quantum mechanics. They are not sciences, either?

Psychology, therefore, is a science. It is a fait accompli, not an opinion. If you think you are the master of the universe by boasting of your skepticism, I recommend you read the following article carefully:

  • “Dunning-Kruger effect: the less we know, the smarter we think”

No hard feelings.

8.You meet a person by chance, you start a conversation, by chance he finds out you’re a psychologist and… He explains his problems to you and demands a diagnosis and treatment in 5 minutes.

Which psychologist hasn’t: you take a taxi to go to another part of the city, and as soon as the taxi driver finds out about your profession, he starts bombarding you with his personal stories and expects you to “diagnose” and “cure” him before you arrive at your destination.

Let’s see: going back to the same thing, we psychologists are not magicians or miracle workers. I’m sorry, really. Nor is it very pleasant to have someone explain their problems to you in five minutes , in a hurry, and hold you responsible for their future on the basis of a diagnosis and a cure that you have to make at the speed of sound.

Normally, psychologists are open-minded people and have no problem in giving a hand to those who need it . But you have to understand that, just as the doctor is not 24 hours a day scanning people on the street for illnesses or the waiter is not dedicated to offering you the menu when he is on holiday, the psychologist cannot be permanently attending to the psychological problems or existential concerns of strangers.

You need to know when it is time to raise these issues, and how to do it . To establish a serious diagnosis, it is necessary to work for hours, even days, of methodical exploration; it requires concentration on the part of the psychologist.

And, be that as it may, and however much humanism is attributed to us, you must also bear in mind that we try to make a living from our work.

9. “Going to the psychologist is for mental retards!”

This is one of the most irritating phrases, since it shows absolute ignorance on many levels. Let’s start: what is a mental moron to you? A madman? If you are referring to people who have some kind of emotional problem, some temporary mood disorder, or some family conflict… how many people would escape from your conception of crazy ?

Besides, in case you didn’t know, psychologists also treat such aseptic issues as sick leave , learning difficulties or couple problems… Not to mention the branch of positive psychology, which is in charge of enhancing the person’s qualities (and therefore its aim is not to “treat” anything, but to enhance some skills in which the person wants to improve).

Of course, to say that those who go to the psychologist are because they are crazy is a real outrage. What’s crazy is not seeking help when you’re not well. And keep in mind that all people, at some point in their lives, will go through some kind of conflict in which the intervention of a therapist would be necessary.

None of the above cases fall into the “crazy” category. Asking a professional for help if you have a problem will not make that problem bigger or smaller . The point is to try to help people, and each case is unique. Let’s not fall into the stigmas of ignorance with those who have the courage to face their fears.

10. “The other day I had a dream… (explains) what does it mean?”

Being a psychologist is not the same as being a psychoanalyst. And I bet that most psychoanalysts wouldn’t know how to offer you a rigorous explanation about the meaning of the dream you just explained in three minutes, without knowing more crucially relevant data when it comes to investigating something as complex and intangible as your unconscious.

The reality is that most psychologists have no training in this type of theories that inquire into the interpretation of dreams based on the analysis of the unconscious, symbols, etc. This is so.

As a diversion, most therapists can try to make some hypothesis about what we think these dreams you have explained may mean, but don’t expect an uncontestable conclusion, because it will be a summary interpretation and a lot of data will be missing to be able to analyze well how your unconscious works.

Have you heard other cliché phrases about psychologists or psychology?