The twenties can be seen as a vital time full of opportunities . Especially if we compare it with other ages, we can think of it as a time of youth, energy, fun and/or experimentation in the absence of responsibilities typical of late adulthood (children, mortgages…).

However, the so-called “millenials” (born between 1981 and 1999) do not always feel as positive emotions as one might expect in this scenario.

What is the quarter-life crisis?

The American psychologist Abby Wilner and the journalist Alexandra Robbins coined the term “quarter-life crisis” in their book with the same name, published in 2001.

Both terms refer to the state of confusion and feelings of being lost and trapped that can arise in the twenties and lead to lifestyle changes , including changes in friendships, relationships and vocations.

Why can we have a crisis when we reach 25?

The economic and social uncertainty, the awareness of the difficulties to become independent from the family of origin and to be autonomous, the possible disappointments before the immersion in the working world, the differences between the life that one thought one was going to have at this age and the one one one really has, the doubts about one’s own performance and abilities before the social demands of perfection and success… These are some of the aspects that have been related to the experience of a crisis when reaching the stage of between 25 and 30 years old.

The society in which we live, which is highly mediatized and exposed in social networks, has established models of “perfect life” accessible 24 hours a day with only having a mobile phone with an Internet connection. We have models on how to dress, how to do our hair, what our body should look like, how we should have fun, what we should eat, where we should work and where to travel to be accepted and considered successful.

This can create a lot of pressure, which we can handle better later in life. In fact, studies have confirmed that the presence of negative emotions (anxiety, sadness, stress, anguish, etc.) is greater in young people than in older people.

What are the fundamental aspects of the quarter-life crisis?

These are the typical signs and symptoms of this psychological phenomenon:

1. The search for a perfect job

Studies have found that young people are particularly focused on achieving a perfect work situation . This includes the search for new jobs, better paid, with fewer hours, higher status, better relationships with peers and less stress. This can lead to a continuous state of tension, anxiety and worry.

2. Awareness and involvement in social and health issues

The experts agree that young people are very aware of the problems that exist in society and of those that they will have to face both on an economic, social and even ecological level in the future.

It has also been pointed out that young people are fully aware of their own state of stress and try to reduce it through concrete activities, such as yoga, meditation, going to the gym or simply resting in bed and sleeping.

3. The prioritization of independence

Compared to older people, studies suggest that people in their twenties place particular importance on their independence. This means developing individual skills that allow for autonomy at all levels , although there is a risk of falling into extreme individuality.

Experts have found that millennials describe personal relationships as an area to be encouraged to achieve personal satisfaction less often than people in their 40s or 50s. Achieving a successful career seems to have become the priority over creating a family , compared to previous generations. Furthermore, the data suggest that young people do not go out and stay with their peers as much as one would expect and even in relation to older people.

4. False spirituality

Studies have detected that interest in spiritual aspects (understood as the need to transcend and self-realization) appears at later ages. Furthermore, they point out a current tendency to seek satisfaction in material and fast, if not fleeting, aspects . This aspect contrasts with spirituality based on deep and bonding aspects, which can only be achieved in the long term.

Conclusion

In short, the crisis of the 25 years (or of the quarter of life) is more common than it may seem a priori. It is related to generational aspects, but also to the social, economic and ecological situation of today’s world.

The shape and length of the transition to adulthood has changed in recent years and can lead to disappointment and frustration if what we expected our life to be does not match our reality. In addition, the lack of certainty, uncertainty and awareness of all the problems that will have to be faced in the future, can also influence the emergence of a state of tension and anxiety.

In the face of this, we can remain blocked or we can try to resignify this state of crisis as an opportunity to make the necessary changes so that our life comes closer to what we want. Crises are a good time to rethink our priorities and values. In addition, in the light of studies, it may be especially relevant to evaluate to what extent we are focusing on work aspects, leaving for later relational aspects (whether around the couple, family or friends) and spiritual aspects linked to satisfaction and self-realization.