We all want to be loved by the person we love . The fact is that finding that special someone who motivates us so much and with whom we want to spend the rest of our lives, makes us feel full and happy. But romantic life as a couple is not always easy, and it can happen that, as time goes by, our partner changes his or her attitude towards us.

The causes of this behaviour can be many, and it is not a good idea to draw conclusions without being sure what is really happening. In these cases, communication is important, but so is observation, because sometimes we can’t just rely on words, but the other person’s behaviour towards us will tell us a lot.

Interpersonal relationships are complex, especially when we find ourselves in these situations, where our emotions may not fit with logic. The capacity for dialogue, respect, tolerance, etc., are elements that help us build trust. But, what do we do when our partner changes his attitude towards us? We will answer this question in the following lines.

Why has our couple changed their attitude?

One of the most painful situations we can go through when we are in a relationship is when the relationship cools down and the signs of affection disappear. We all want to feel loved, but over time, the relationship can get cold, and that doesn’t necessarily mean that there is no love and that the love is gone. Habituation is a frequent phenomenon in relationships, and that is why experts advise that, in order to succeed in a relationship, you have to take care of it and work on it on a daily basis.

But with time everything changes, also the feelings. Sometimes it is also necessary to accept that the intensity of the initial infatuation can lead to a more mature love, which we discuss in our article “Mature love: why the second love is better than the first”, and which may not be as intense but is more authentic. This feeling is usually normal, so it is not a good idea to draw conclusions out of place. Speaking of things, most of the time it is possible to understand if love between two people exists.

On the other hand, the reason for your partner’s change in attitude may simply be the result of stress, of having a bad time at work, something that can also influence the relationship and that tends to change when the problematic situation improves. Another cause of the change in your partner’s attitude may be the usual conflicts, which would cause erosion in the relationship and demotivation of the members. Something that could cause you to rethink what the situation is from now on, and may even deteriorate that nice initial feeling .

What to do when our partner changes his attitude

As you can see, changing one’s attitude is not always a serious problem, but it can happen that there are factors that have an influence (a third person) that can make the relationship toxic. Whatever the cause, if your partner’s attitude towards you has changed, you can take note of the advice below .

1. Try not to be catastrophic

It is very common that, when faced with this type of situation, one tends to dramatize and draw conclusions ahead of time. This increases distrust and leads to a vicious circle from which it is difficult to escape. Avoid rumination and those thoughts that increase conflict. Sometimes reality has nothing to do with what we think.

2. Avoid mind games

As we enter this vicious circle, the terrain becomes more and more swampy. This causes the members of a relationship to drift apart rather than get closer. If the situation is not as bad as you imagine, what you can do is cause the relationship to deteriorate and, therefore, you end up ruining something that was not so bad. So be mature and don’t adapt your behaviour to attract their attention .

3. Observe the situation and analyze the behavior of both

Besides avoiding mind games, you should observe the situation but in an objective way . This also includes observing your behaviour and analysing your attitude, because your way of doing things may have influenced how your partner feels.

4. Be empathetic

Taking into account the previous point, it is convenient to be empathetic . That is, if you think you might be a bit guilty of his change of attitude, you should be empathetic and get under his skin. This is the best way for you to be objective in your decisions.

5. Talk to your partner

Once you have followed the steps above, it is a good time to talk to your partner . Communication is a key element in the progress of any courtship or marriage. Therefore, it is necessary that you and your partner express what you feel about each other and, if there has been a misunderstanding, talk about it in a mature way,

6. Ask for respect

In cases where your partner is not honest with you or you notice that he is being disrespectful , you should make him respect you. There is always a chance that their change of attitude is not directly dependent on you.

7. Make a decision

At this point, if you feel that your partner is disrespecting you, it’s time to make a decision. If, after talking to him or her, you are defensive, you may be playing games or you may be disillusioned with the relationship. If this situation lasts for a long time, you may have to reconsider whether you really want to stay there or not .